Perfect Love Casts Out Fear

I just finished a six week inner healing prayer ministry. It was incredibly difficult, exhausting, sometimes deeply sad and yet life-giving, healing, and hopeful at the same time. Each week I sent out prayer requests to a few friends whom I had asked to pray for me through the process. As I shared what the Lord was revealing to me and how he was leading me to pray I was met with many responses of gratefulness for my vulnerability, it turned out that many others had the same struggles, questions and fears that I did.

There are some dark thoughts in my head at times, some places of my heart that I am sure if people knew they would not love and accept me, their perception of me would change completely.

But then, slowly, as I unveil these places I find with surprising joy that many others feel the same way. I don't have to live in fear of rejection or embarrassment and when I choose not to and share those places of my heart not only do I move into greater freedom but it enables others to as well.

Below is the last email I sent out before the end of my time in this ministry. It was scary to write these things down and press send. If I hadn't I would have still believed I was the only one, if I hadn't I wouldn't have opened up the opportunity for healing in my heart and the heart's of others. So I decided to not only press "send" but to press "publish" as well, and send this out into the deep void where I am sure, at least one other person will say, "me too".

Hi friends,

Well, it's officially my last week with Abor Springs prayer ministry. Home stretch! I know the work has just begun and therefore would love for you to continue praying through things with me even after this process is over.

I have been really challenged in the last couple of weeks regarding my perception of God and the events in my life. Do I really believe God is good and that His intentions towards me are good? I have also been challenged in my own devotion to the Lord, He has asked me to choose Him above all else and to choose Him no matter what and I have been wrestling with this the last few weeks as I've prayed over relationships, chronic pain and other things that easily lead me to a place of mistrust and depression.

My prayer is that I will dig deep, that I will be "deep earth" if you will, that I will trust God when everything seems against me and that I will praise Him and love Him in all circumstances. That I will allow Him to work instead of striving in my own flesh. And I think most of all that I will believe that He loves me in all circumstances.

My other prayer is how I relate to others, I have been praying to find my validation in the Lord so that as I know I am loved I am free to love others unconditionally. That I will take what people say and do at face value and trust them and most importantly trust the Lord.

"There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear." 1 John 4:18